The eyes are the windows to our souls!!!

To wear a mask daily is to deny your soul from living.

Depression takes a while to take hold like the silence of the night it creeps up and takes you unaware. Once it holds on it buries itself deeper, much like the bug that buries deep into the rug for warmth.

It takes months to peel off the layers that covered your soul. Some times without support we never quite get free and death is an option some choose. We don’t kill our selves because of our loved ones we don’t deliberately choose to leave them.


IT’S NOT ABOUT YOU- OR THEM, BUT ME. A tortured soul that believes eternal sleep will give  the freedom to let go!!




55 years young and still making mistakes!!

All those who wish you well on a birthday are the ones important in your life. Those who are missing are missing for a reason. I have had a wonderful day but it was marred by my past and revelations that when my abuser broke my leg it was broken the day before my 14th birthday. Read more…

Ten Years ago today 9/11

Today is the tenth anniversary of a day that bought sadness and anger from all four corners of the world. Life is fickle and at a seconds notice we could lose some one without even knowing until that fateful knock on the door.

World trade centre is left burning and on the verge of collapse the pentagon collapses.  Hijacking – mass murders and terrorism at its evilest. 2,958 innocent people died and  more than 6,000 injured.

Mass suicide is committed when 19 Al-Qaeda hijackers die in the execution of their religious beliefs. Read more…

Esther Rantzen

Ref- Esther Rantzen reveals disgusting attack aged 15. The mail on-line


How I envy people who can be so matter of fact in there judgment towards some one who, after 50 years has decided to speak out about her experiences at the hands of a paedophile. I just wish I had the inability to believe it can happen like some of the people who have judged Miss Rantzen account on the mail on-line page. Read more…

Paedos charter lets them see kids, the sun newspaper August 22 2011-08-23

Again the human rights of the paedophile are put ahead of the safety and wellbeing of a victim.

When a child is abused- sexual – physically and or mentally do these judges who make these rulings consider the victims.


Raped, left bleeding humiliated when told by paedophile it was their fault. Bloodied and bruised torn apart soul when told by the attacker – they made them do it. Read more…

Depression, a lonely vile road!!

Depression is an illness that makes the sufferer stand-alone. We are never really sure why we get so depressed that it becomes clinically severe, but I do know it is a lonely vile road to travel. I have recently just got over a period of depression that was caused by many factors in my life.

It started with my desire to better my self so I searched the internet for an agent to help catapult me into the media and become known as a public speaker, and  also get my message about child abuse issues Read more…

life’s trials

I have been working now for a little over a month on my new venture, fish pedicure. It has been a mixed bag of emotions as I struggle with my private life and business. My son is home on leave from Afghanistan and my mother in-law due home from rehabilitation after a series of strokes. The girls are settled into Nursery after a few weeks of them getting infected with chickenpox. Sods law is they couldn’t get it together and as one returned to nursery the other became ill so a whole month was taken up by antihistamine medication and calamine lotion.   Read more…

Life is not a rehearsal!!

Your life is not a rehearsal so dont go over the bad bits and hold onto the sadness. Get up, dust your self off and rev up for the future.Each day is an unexplored adventure each with ups and downs. If you keep standing still in the ocean the sands will cave in and drag you down, so keep swimming. I know how hard life can be and how destructive the out come. But at the end of the day we are in control of our destiny. Its okay to mourn our loss and to grieve – feel anger when bereft. Read more…

Amy Winehouse Dead!

Amy Winehouses death has bought to the forefront how judgmental people can be. What spiteful innuendoes some have placed on the Internet about her death.
She wasn’t just an addict or a drunk. These were merely things she took. She was however a daughter – sibling- niece =- and friend to many. She was talented and had the most soulful voice I have ever heard. She was loved by her family and adored by her fans.
I am the mother of a son who is addicted to heroin it’s a terrible rollercoaster of emotions for the addict as well as the family. If my son passed away as a direct result of his addiction I would mourn my loss just as deeply as I would my son who fights in Afghanistan. Read more…

New Business

When you start up your own business you never seem to think about the time and effort it ill take for it to really start earning you a descent living.

But I was reminded of this when arriving at work and most of my Garra Fish were dead and the tank resembled a massacre. It has taken me most of the morning to clean and reset the tank up and hopefully the remaining fish will be okay. Thank goodness I allowed for this when setting up but can only cope a few times with this out come. Read more…